BETHESDA. A glitch in The Matrix occurred earlier today as NCBI’s services briefly went down, serving to remind us all that we actually live in pods, asleep, existing only to provide energy to a super-race of hyper-intelligent aliens, known collectively as “The Bioinformaticians”.
The 20-minute downtime caused so much panic that some desperate scientists began suggesting everyone should switch to the EBI’s tools instead. Luckily the NCBI came back up very quickly, as The Bioinformaticians noticed the glitch and removed it.
“Look, I don’t really care about an existential crisis based on the fact that this is all a drug-induced reality and that I am in fact about to have my kidneys harvested by space aliens” said Ed Smalls, a PhD student at MIT. “But I’m half way through writing my thesis, don’t f*cking take away PubMed!” he finished.
The largest database at NCBI is of course the Short Read Archive, and whilst The Science Web tried in vain to find anyone who was actually using the database at the time, we were told that in fact no-one ever had.